September-october recap

“Autumn in New York, why does it seem so inviting?”

The leaves are changing colors. The daylight is getting shorter. The air is crispier. Parents are busy picking up their kids after school. People are shopping for new jackets. University students are pulling all-nighters for midterms.

Autumn in New York is more vibrant with colorful foliage and varying apples and funky gourds displayed at the farmer’s market. Not to forget, the foul smell of the ginkgo trees makes you wonder if you’ve stepped on a dog poop. Thank goodness, your shoes are safe.

I love fall but also despise it at the same time. The cooler weather reminds me of the past that I want to forget about. I recently wrote an essay that basically describes my current mental state. If you’re curious, check it out and you’ll know what I mean when I say, “things are falling apart.” Maybe it’s the symbolism of fallen leaves that reminds me of my mental health spiraling downward?

The countdown to my layoff certainly does not help. I’ve gotten several interviews but nothing solid as of yet. Despite promising responses to the interviews and recruiters reaching out, I haven’t gotten an offer. I am exhausted from this war.

The job market is flat and so many of us are looking for new opportunities. Whether you’re laid off due to a trend of restructuring within institutions or the political fiasco in Washington–or worse, you have a toxic manager… we live in a society where we are constantly walking on egg shells — unexpected of what’s to come next. I oftentimes wonder if the bourgeoisie will go extinct by the next century or so. The rapid growth of technology and oligarchical nature of global capitalism are reverting our current socioeconomic structure into a futurist-feudalism (I might coin the term). All this is to say, our perception of the world and the environment continues to remain negative despite some victories and positive uptick. Maybe it’s the social media?

I don’t know but I don’t like it.

But then, I also try to find little moments of joy. Like, when I ate a delicious s’mores cookie from the Westside Market or when I took the first sip of a dirty martini that was icy cold. Little things like that — here and there– that I know I shouldn’t take it for granted and instead, count my blessings.

September and October went by fast but I got to enjoy last bits of sun/warmth and longer daylight.

Dirty martini at Vintage Green Rooftop. I waited at the bar before my friend joined. Let’s just say…I got buzzed and I needed it.

My talented friend captured this for me at the rooftop. The view of the Empire State Building is breathtaking at night.

Mom cooked this elaborate dinner for Jen’s birthday. And yes, she made everything from scratch–including kimchi. This “bap sang”–traditional Korean celebration meal–included, galbi jjim (slow braised ribs), dong-geurang-ttaeng (meat fritters), nok-doo-jeun (mung bean pancakes), potato salad, and mi-yeok guk (seaweed soup).

I took this photo as I was waiting for the D train after rehearsal. I sent it to my friend who’s currently in Boston for law school. Gosh, I miss her!

On my way to the first orchestra concert of the season.

Inside the Steinway & Sons recital hall in Midtown Manhattan.

Sunset at Central Park tennis courts.

I saw the sun beaming through the stained glass at Riverside Church. Different colors of the glass reminded me of us. When compounded together, we tell different stories in unity.

I’ve been listening to my ‘Autumn – Like a film’ playlist. One of my favorites during this season is “Autumn In New York” sung by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong.

“Autumn in New York, why does it seem so inviting? Autumn in New York, it spells the thrill of first-nighting.”¹

Cheers,

Source: LyricFind. Songwriter: Vernon Duke. ↩︎