It is officially spring, and I am an angry bird. Why? Because I’m tired of being tired of these ruthless employers who ghost candidates even after promising final rounds of interviews.
I know I shouldn’t take it personally, but also it’s a demoralizing experience when you put your time and energy on these apps and interviews. To any employers who are reading this – please, communicate and inform the candidates if they are not selected as soon as possible. Especially those that you interviewed. “But we have a lot to do and don’t have time to message all the candidates!” Neither do we because when we get rejected, we have to start from square one of searching for a position and going through the process again. Oftentimes, a little too much. I think informing the candidates is a courtesy after the interviews (but then, who knows anything about courtesy in our current society?).
As an angry bird, here are some things that I’ve learned during this time of my life. And maybe some of you might resonate with me.
I. Optimism is good but it’s ok to throw a punch.
I sometimes joke that toxic positivity is a new form of bullying. What I mean by that is people often dismiss your feelings and experiences by saying insensitive things like, “Everything happens for a reason,” or the worst, “God has a plan and still loves you.” While it’s important to stay optimistic, dismissing your feelings, thoughts, and experiences during the process can be counterproductive and even, unhealthy.
I still remember when someone told me to “think positively” and “not dwell on the past” when I shared my battle with depression. (As if it’s that easy to do!) For me, personally, when one says those cliché phrases when being vulnerable, it sounds like, “Sucks for you, and I don’t care.” Perhaps it’s their way of protecting themselves from negative energy or omen? I do think there are gentler and more considerate ways to respond.
During this challenging time of unemployment, I know that I will get something at the end. Life goes on and there’s still so much ahead of me. But, I can’t help but be angry at things that are not within my control. Like the current state of our economy, AI jacking up the recruitment and application processes, companies being fiscally conservative, and mismanagement of priorities by our leaders. Those are some valid concerns and unfortunately, affecting the daily lives of working and middle class people.
It’s okay to be angry at them. We are not wired to be robots. We have emotions. There’s also healthy anger. If all of us refrained from being angry, we wouldn’t have pioneers and leaders who fought for equal rights or better societies throughout human history.
Always manifest your dreams and aspire for something greater, but it’s okay to be angry and throw a punch (and drink a punch) to let it all out.
II. Don’t turn away from things that you normally do or find joy in.
When I first entered this new era of post-layoff, I thought that staying in and being a diligent job seeker would make me productive and protect my finances. I was so wrong.
If I had not continued my love for playing the violin by doing orchestra and string quintet, I would have been trapped in a molasses of depressive despair. Thank goodness for this hobby and the wonderful people I get to see and work with on a weekly basis.
While it’s important to turn your focus on job applications—ever more so in this competitive market, try to have other things going for you to keep yourself busy, ambitious, and connected. This is important when job rejections will make you question your potential and the future. It can be simple as watering the plants at your local community garden or taking an evening stroll with your dog.
Remain the routine of joyful things.
III. Turn off unsolicited advice (including the social media “influencers”).
Ironic how I’m telling you to ignore unsolicited advice yet I’m writing this “advice-motivational-like” post. Well, I’m sharing my experience and what has helped me during the process–and perhaps, you might relate or find it helpful, too.
I can’t tell you how many times people have told me what I should do or how I should approach the job search. Most of them are outdated, irrelevant advice.
- “Have you considered reaching out to the hiring manager directly?”
- “Why don’t you print your resume and go to the recruiter’s office in-person?” (Sure! Let me book a flight ticket to Montana where she’s located!/s)
- “Have you considered using AI for your application materials?” (I’ve never even heard of AI. Is that the same as A1 steak sauce?/s)
And the most delusional one –
- “There are plenty of jobs. You just need to apply aggressively.”
The people who’ve told me these things have not been on a job hunt for more than 10 years. Some don’t know what an AI or LinkedIn is. And very few people from my age group have not updated their LinkedIn profile nor have been on it for more than a year. Is it just me or do they sound like privilege?
Unless you’ve been actively applying for jobs since 2025, you really don’t know what it’s like and it’s time for you to STFU. I want to emphasize the word “actively.” Because it’s different when you NEED a job vs. when you want a new job.
Our experiences are different because our jobs/fields are different. And when you’re going through a vulnerable stage of unemployment, it’s very important that you stick to your principals and remain consistent and persistent with your goals. So next time when you come across a video/reel about what you need to do during an interview or what signs to look for from the vultures–I mean, employers, do NOT listen to them or at least, take it with a grain of salt.
Because let’s face it, how many times have we gone back and replayed every movement or things we said during fake-it-til-you-make-it interviews?
I have.
I looked on Reddit and one of them said, “If you don’t hear back within three days, you didn’t get it.” A swift recruitment from a company is also a red flag. Not everything you hear and read online is the absolute truth.
BIG ANNOUNCEMENT:
I finally got a job offer!
When I began writing this post, I had no idea that I would land a job by the end of March. I guess you’ll never know how life will unfold. That being said, I was an angry bird and still at times, an angry bird. I don’t retract any words I said about unemployment and the process of applying to jobs. It was hell and the war is over. Grateful and relief are an understatement.
I’ll be happy drinking.
Cheers,
funeunice 
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